Monday, 17 November 2014
What do you see in this moment surrounding you as you read these words? Is it a table, a garden view or perhaps a wall in a hotel? Is your attention flickering between noting what is “outside and surrounding you” to what your feeling inside? Perhaps an inner conflict of “to do” and “should be done” is going on. Maybe you consciously decided to take a moment to have a break from a business document and check into my blog site therefore there is, no conflict going on. Or maybe it came from a scrolling down the Instagram postings and you then redirected to this side feeling curious and there is the conflict, for you had not intended to spend so much “time out” doing social media “things”.
Where ever your sitting at this present moment reading this, between whatever you are doing, it is meant to “be”. You are required to know something very simple. Something you overlook so often, which should hold your number one placement spot upon your list of things “to do, and be aware of daily”. Here it is and I will separate it from this line so you can read it clearly. There is nothing you are meant to do.
Ok you say but I am meant to breathe. Really? I always thought that just occurred. A natural born attribute you are given when you get the first “shock of your life” coming wretched out of the encasing of the warm, motherly womb and into the surgical lights. I will state it again.
There is nothing you are meant to do.
I am meant to keep fit you cry. Why? Was that not something we naturally did when we “hunted and gathered” for our food? It is just in these times in which we live, that term has become more “overload”. I sense the shopping cart size has definitely a connection to the expanding clothing size, which has slowly increased inch-by-inch, year-by-year.
“Do not buy it” your thinking. I am required to get an education, earn a good wage, and love my neighbour. I am … Stop. Right there. Honestly it is the same old carousel you’re giving out which we all find ourselves spinning upon one time or another. A rehashed statement, which I have heard a thousand times before. Yet it is honestly also ok. For some folks really are convinced they are here to hold onto property or make a good social impression or provide for their family or even fix the wrongs of the wronged, depending on who they see as being persecuted. So one more time here: There is nothing you are meant to do.
Oh you’re seeing I have highlighted something. Good. I want to help you out here a wee bit. You see our society has become a collection of doers. We do social projects. Do makeovers. Do workouts. Do exams. Do, do, do till our bodies wear out, our minds go numb and our souls are “sold out” to the highest bidder for “doing it right”. To do requires a person, institution, government, organisation, moral group, basically something or one to tell you it is this way to walk, talk, act or “do” this, that or whatever. So what really do you need to do if there is nothing I should be doing? I believe you need to actually rather be. Be love. Be alive. Be aware. Be patience. Be active. Be peace. Honestly you can be what ever you want. Just be you. Be the light you were born from. Be the essence of what you brought into this world before it got all caught up in doing.
To be L O V E is to
Let Openness Venture Endlessly forwards or
Live Over Vindictive Elements effortlessly and have
Limitless Outreaching Voluminous Energy, expanding from within and reaching out into the universe surrounding you.
To “do” something I need enormous energy, to implication my action. Whether it is a friendly or aggressive undertaking really doesn’t matter. It requires effort. You become so tired up to rallying to this cause or that, with only the slogan “do now something”, “we can’t do without your help”, “do not undertake that step” or “do you not hear what I demand of you” you loose being you.
To “be” your true self takes more effort than just doing what is asked of you. That is why I know it is for the majority of you who read this a lot to swallow. For “to be yourself”, “ to be love”, “to be the pure essence of life in the living form of a caring, compassionate and peace filled person, you actually are required to be happy within yourself”. Totally content as a baby in the womb of its mother, secure and nourished by the love it receives. For when you are totally comfortably in your own skin, your own area, which you occupy then you can give unconditionally and willingly love. Requiring no back up or deposit as a security blanket. You do not need that. You are then being what you were born to be. Pure love in personification being here to shine, support your fellow man/woman/child and create something miraculous – heaven on earth now.
How do you begin to be? Not do. A good place to start is accepting you as you are, with all your corners, edges and bumps. They are correct in just the manner they stand today. Look at the three forms of “Love” above and ponder how you can be open, less vindictive and outreaching to the world surrounding you and in which you live. That would be a start and as you continue to ponder remember there is nothing you are meant to do for you need only be love. That would be the best start out to creating a new world for all to live in harmony. I know I do not what to” imagine” this change within humanity, so we can survive. I want to be the change that gives us the change to thrive!
Friday, 7 November 2014
To be captivated can be horrific. It can cause irreversible damage to you. To be captivated can be exhilarating. It can cause permanent elation for you. Both forms of captivity effect the same person – Who? You!
To capture your heart I need to do what? Set a trap that makes you promises that can never be fulfilled. To capture your attention do I need to bewitch you, luring you into a place where your aim is to strive to obtain that which is held, like a tempting morsel in front of your nose, for health, wealth or immortally?
To be captivated in a world of greed, power and so-called might is not hard. To be held captivated within the walls of an illusion that the fashion, media or other morons of “correct behaviour” would like us to believe is easy enough. The allure in their paradox of what’s good can cause you to take pills, swallow potions, get “tucked and nipped” and sell your soul.
So what is this captivity or captive state I talk about here? Am I referring to capture, as meaning to be only held hostage, within a state of being confined to a small space, from which it is difficult or impossible to escape? If I was then in its worst form it explodes into life in that of “blood and war”; conflicting religious and mind games, which we see as images daily, flashed in front of our eyes, when we watch various controversial news stations. That is not were I am going.
I am not talking either of the enthral captivating feeling, which enraptures you into living a “Barbie and Ken” lifestyle. Chasing an illusion or simply going through someone else’s textbook list, to create a beguile life of “pleasure and pain” entrapment. Although many of you can’t get past this it is not what I want to address.
I would like to rather deal with the captured entanglement of yourself; within the prison walls you have created over the years, in your own inner world, buried deep down inside your unconsciousness. The areas in your life in which you have ordered rulebooks to live by, without even realizing you do it. How they hold you in constraint, strangulating the center of your love – your heart. The straitjacket of your upbringing, past experiences and set definitions of what is right and wrong. The stunting of the person you are now because you, yes you, ensnare your true core self in restrictions. Placing them on the pathway of your future, never being able to step over them for fear of being “blown apart” by the unleashed power they have over you. And the saddest part is often you do not even realize it until it is to late.
Capture. Captivate. Captivity. Three “Cs” from which our ego, feed willingly by societies power push, plays upon with delight as we struggle with the daily play of being. I capture moments in time and place them with tenderness in my mind to recall on a rainy day. Perhaps it is a birthday celebration or a feeling I have when something goes right or maybe I am captivated by the way my family feels I hold everything together perhaps– household, job, private time, remembering appointments and sending off regularly the birthday cards to distant relatives. Or maybe I am held in captivity by my own sense of righteousness having allowed the Sunday school sermons of my childhood to keep me in check; turn the other cheek, even when I know the reasons are ridiculous, holding too many paradoxes for making any sense. Any of this sounds familiar? So how to brake free from this mesmerizing death wish to not “be” the true you.
Let me give you a concrete example from myself. There was a moment in time that I captured myself saying something a second time round, in which I just for the life of me could not stand fully behind anymore. I stated, “To live in a foreign country and run my own business I would have to learn the language first hence going back to school would be a needed “action”.“ Why was I saying this? I was reciting something so silly to my girlfriend before leaving Australia, for I felt bound to say it to her, as a form of confirmation I was doing a “rational thing” (she thought I was bananas). This was the first time I made this statement. She was a teacher, a planner and a follower of procedure so this was expected of me right? I had already made the decision to travel overseas, without hesitation I might add, going into the hospitality industry with my husband speaking not a word of German in Germany. So obviously I did not really believe what I was reciting otherwise I wouldn’t be doing this, right? Yet my schooling, my upbringing and some of my family and friends considered my statement an essential fact to be carried out. So I said it to myself inside my mind, again and again.
Upon arriving in Germany, fascinated by the cultural differences surrounding me, I threw myself into every aspect of life with gusto. I made heaps of mistakes in the language. I floundered. I was embarrassed and at times humiliated. I felt like a small child caged in an adults body. I struggled, felt ashamed at my limitations and I remembered what I had said to my friend downunder; so I enrolled in night school for the “German Proficiency Certificate” programme for foreigners. Not a conversational course but rather a ridged, constricting timetable of grammatical constraints, set timetables and examination guidelines. I pushed myself through the first years semesters with the pressures of business breathing down my neck. Along with raising two small children, juggling my community involvement (kindergarten and English Sunday school duties and village life) and feeling completely lacking as a person because I was frustrated at not “pulling it together quicker” in the written form of German. Add to that my autoimmune sickness that makes my brain at times literally “fog up”, I was losing the essence of me.
Then one evening my German teacher Mrs Vorneck came to eat in our restaurant along with her husband. The restaurant was full and I was really kept on my toes but still I had enough time to converse with each and every guest. Asking if they enjoyed their meal or enquiring (if they were regulars) how their recent holiday was or after their family. I talked about wines, my husbands cooking, the reasons we had opened a restaurant in an area it is said, “the fox and rabbit say good night to one another”. When I came to my teacher’s table her husband asked me why I was doing the language course by his wife. I stated, for a second time, “To live in a foreign country and run my own business I felt I would have to learn the language first hence going to night school is a necessity.” He said with amazement to me but “that is what I already did to perfection – speak the language; writing it word perfect could not improve at all on what you say now. It is amazing how you converse. Your vocabulary and handling of the difficult German language is exceptional”. I was suddenly bluffed as his wife said she could not agree more.
When had I captivated myself into thinking I was only of value in being able to handle a second language when I could produce a International certificate to say I could bring it onto paper, word perfect? So it was that I began to break out of that confined space from which I had been conditioned to believing was difficult or impossible to escape out of. The capture of me, needing to be perfect. I took my own life back in my hands. I realized that I did not feel, see, view or stand by what I was saying in relation to learning German to be able to work here in Germany anymore. I was reclaiming my ground as an individual and it felt good. For the “captivating moment” mentioned above (the conversation with the Vorneck´s) made me also feel again my own power of being a valuable human and of having a choice. That is what I am talking about here. Realizing how we allow ourselves to disappear through what is given out, as being correct, needed, required. We give up the voice of the one person who can be free to create change and make a difference - ourselves. We learn from an early age to be rather “bonded and tied” to a group view than express our own individual opinion.
I stopped the cruelling German lessons and stepped with joy into going to German theatre, reading fabulous German novels from passionate local authors, conversing with the neighbours about topics of home grown importance and just being me. Writing in my mother tongue while creating with the conversational usage of my second language a world I want to live in. I captured myself in a moment, not following through with giving the most important person in my life - me – my undivided attention. Thank goodness I did.
Yet it is this standing up for the fire that burns within your soul, which is fuelled by a passion to start something new, that allows you to break free and plant a garden for tomorrows feeding of humanity. To do this you need to know you are worth every ounce of your being. It matters not a pickle if you are living in a land in which you were born. Your view is needed wherever your domicile is. Your participation, in breaking the shackles of restriction for those less able to, is essential to the future of our world. Each and every one of us is valuable. We have a voice which can be heard when we release the iron bands around our heart, holding in our love for ourselves and allowing it to spill out. Gathering at the end of the rainbow our own pot of gold.
Begin my stepping out of the captivity of needing to be part of a unit. Captivate yourself being you and become captivating for the world.
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